BEHOLD! The COCKATRICE!
A neurotic monstrosity for your modern mascot needs.
Episode 21 – Cockatrice
20 – Cloaker
BEHOLD! The CLOAKER!
Half manta ray, half old coat, all gimmick.
19 – Chuul
BEHOLD! The CHUUL!
Sentience settled, Japanese Bug Fights, and the golf ball maker’s apprentice.
18 – Chimera
BEHOLD! The Chimera!
Putting a hat on a hat, echidnas aren’t just small ant-eaters, and Bellerophon was totally a PC.
17 – Centaur
BEHOLD! The Centaur!
Party monsters, noble poison victims, and a human butt on top of a horse butt.
16 – Carrion Crawler
BEHOLD! The Carrion Crawler!
Dungeon Slug, Dungeon Slug, Dungeon Slug, and Pepsi.
15 – Cambion
BEHOLD! The Cambion!
Bad tattoos, angsty teens, and sexy devils.
14 – Bullywug
BEHOLD! The Bullywug!
Hobbes’ Leviathan, poisonous frogs, and gross faces you want to punch.
13 – Bulette
BEHOLD! The Bulette!
Land-sharks, dollar stores, and power rangers.
12 – Bugbear
BEHOLD! The Bugbear!
Military Muppets, monster rehab centers, and high speed gobo-Darwinism.
11 – Blights
BEHOLD! BLIGHTS!
Wes knows a thing or two about tree oil, the whole forest actively hates you, and these peas are really big, as far as peas go.
10 – Beholder
BEHOLD! The Beholder!
Finally got that out of my system. Chris justifies his hand tattoo with crazy talk, special guest Karol talks Cacodemon copyright, and Wes describes his experience of the ideal Beholder encounter (screaming, lasers).
9 – Behir
BEHOLD! The Behir!
The first potential dud is narrowly avoided by turning everything into weasels, demonstrating advanced eel knowledge, and cutting out some cardboard dragons.
8 – Basilisk
BEHOLD! The Basilisk!
Bad smelling chickens, how to generate rats, and an idea that enslaves you by thinking about it.
7 – Banshee
BEHOLD! The Banshee!
Misogynistic biology, professional mourners, and, while ghosts are real, we’d really like you not to think about them.
6 – Azer
BEHOLD! The Azer!
Metal-based racism, fire worship and sexy elves trying not to be sexy.
5 – Ankheg
BEHOLD! THE ANKHEG!
9 AM is a bad time to watch Tremors, giant ants might actually be marmots, and a tree coming out of your neck HAS to mean something.
4 – Animated Objects
BEHOLD! Animated Objects!
This rug was made for smothering, and that’s just what it’ll do. We talk chairs who think they’re cows, magic as advertising, and the nefarious implications of Pixar’s Cars.
BEHOLD!
Myth, history, human psyche, crunchy numbers and bad improv: these are the tools Chris and Wes use every week to dredge meaning and knowledge from every page of the Dungeons and Dragons official Monster Manual, all to help you run the most memorable game sessions ever.
3 – Angels
BEHOLD! Some angels!
Wes and Chris talk muscly, feathery, Abrahamic HUNKS. With the right setup, you can use them right out of the box, but have you considered covering them in eyes or making them look like a giant wheel?
2 – Aboleth
BEHOLD! The Aboleth!
D&D’s favorite mind-controlling fish blob. Wes is all for it, but Chris thinks it’s a hot mess. Is it Lovecraft-ian enough? What are “globsters”? And, have you ever seen an exploding whale?
1 – Aarakocra
Welcome to Monster Manual Mash!
We are no one in particular, and we pick apart every entry in the Dungeons and Dragons monster manual, drawing from history, mythology, arm-chair psychology, pop culture and our own improv to figure out what makes each one tick.
BEHOLD! The Aaraokocra!
What do bird people from the elemental plane of air have to do with Buddhism, Romulans, and the planet Jupiter? Maybe if you LISTENED you would know, ok?
NOTE: We botched the quality of the recording so it sounds tinny. Wes fixes some of it part way through but, it is what it is. Rather than rerecord and lose the spontaneity and energy of our conversation, we are asking you to grin and bear it this time around. Don’t be precious. Sorry. Sorry. We get better!
